Anna's Write

An Unfortunate Movie Experience

This afternoon we saw Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events and it was… OK. The story was slightly slow in places. Jim Carrey was good, if not creepy. The most interesting part of the movie was the Lemony Snicket fans sitting next to us. They had obviously read the books cover-to-cover. They were very excited to see what the different characters would look like… only, they were all in their EARLY 30’S.

Let me say that again… THE LEMONY SNICKET FAN CLUB WAS FULL OF 30- YEAR-OLD MEN. NO KIDS IN SIGHT.

The weirdness started, coincidentally, when the movie started. Flying stars appeared on the screen during the opening credits and someone at the entrance sang, “The stars at night are big and bright…”

Uncomfortable silence in the theater.

Then, the guy next to Jason quietly claps and mumbles, “Deep in the heart of Texas.”

The singer down at the entrance didn’t hear his little friend’s response so the friend jumped out of his seat and BOUNCED down the stairs to meet his friend. It was like an 8- year-old in a 30-year-old’s body.

Then, all during the movie, the bouncer and the singer proceeded to hold a competition as to who thought the movie was the funniest. They laughed so hard at scenes that were only mildly funny to the actual kids in the audience. They kept repeating lines from the movie and laughing together. They discussed how the movie differed from all of the Lemony Snicket books. They anticipated changes in plot and laughed AHEAD of the action.

All I want to know is… who the hell are these people? Sure, we went to SpongeBob and we thought it was funny but we weren’t GIDDY to be at the movie. And yes, we drove all the way to McMinnville yesterday to get SpongeBob watches, but we didn't advertise to everyone in the restaurant that we drove an hour to get there. Ok. We're dorks too. But today we were thrilled to find there are dorkier adults than us!

Shaun of the Dead

From the makers of Four Weddings and a Funeral, Notting Hill, Love Actually comes a drop- dead funny zombie movie. OK, the pun was just plain bad. Sorry 'bout that.

Jason and I saw this film tonight in Tigard (pronounced Ty-grrrd) after a lovely dinner at Applebee's (let's just say the appetizer came AFTER the main course-- but hey, it's Applebee's so what can you expect?).

This movie is a sort-of spoof on 28 Days Later with Londoners turning into flesh-eating zombies. The hero is a loser character who is so out of tune with society that it takes him a while to realize people are zombies and then he never really gets the full story about how they became zombies because, let's face it, news is boring. Just the filmmaking is funny... because it makes fun of thriller flicks that make you jump in your seat.

The movie has some HILARIOUS scenes with the zombies-- 'cuz they move slow! There are also some heart-warming scenes with Shaun's girlfriend and his mother. And the very end is LAUGH-OUT-LOUD material.

I don't want to give too much of it away... I'd just recommend seeing it. This isn't a movie where you chuckle, it's a movie where you holler and double-over with laughter.

Andy and Julie: if you can get a babysitter, you should see this. You'd laugh yourselves silly.

Link: Official Movie Website

Potter: The Best One Yet!

We went to see the second showing of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban this afternoon and it was great! It really was much better than the first two-- for instance, the main chracters don't spend so much time giving suspicious looks to each other. There's quite a lot of action and much of the movie has nothing to do with the school so we don't have to sit through too many magical classes. It also seemed to move much faster than the others. Perhaps that has to do with the fact that this movie had a different director. Chris Columbus, for some reason, did not do this one and I think that made it much better. The new director had a lot of arty shots that were just plain cool (you have to see the mirror scene).

Seeing it again made me want to read the book again because I know there is so much the screenwriters left out. Harry just gets cuter and cuter (please, can I have a kid who looks like him?!?) and all the kids are becoming much better actors. There is a definite difference in the way the new actor plays Dumbledore (the previous actor died) and I didn't like him as much as the original because he didn't seem as calm and reassuring and caring. He's barely in this one though-- it's just a heck of a lot of Harry, Hermione and Ron. There's a storyline featuring Emma Thompson as a professor that plays out much stronger and has more significance in the book. I think the screenwriters could've just left her out and we wouldn't have missed anything. Her only role in the movie was to scary Harry by telling him he was going to die. There was enough scary stuff happening in this movie that we could've done without her.

This movie is definitely darker than the first two-- there are some incredibly scary monsters in this one... and they come after Harry!

I felt like the first two movies were too long but this one I was sad to see come to an end. I found myself thinking that I really wanted the movie to go on even after sitting there 2 hours, 21 minutes!

Super Size Me

OH. MY. GOD.

This is one of the best documentaries I have ever seen. A filmmaker named Morgan Spurlock decided to eat EVERY MEAL at McDonald's for 30 days. His motivation? To do a science experiment on himself.

He laid a few ground rules: he could only consume whatever was sold at McDonald's so if he had a headache he was out of luck because Mickey D's does not sell aspirin. Luckily for him it does sell bottled water. And he would order his combo meals regular size but if the McDonald's employee asked him if he wanted to Super Size then he would. He vomited the first time he Super Sized.

Spurlock makes some amazing comparisons to alcoholism and smoking in this film. He starts out as a very healthy 30-something and just gets sick and grumpy and depressed and unhealthy over 30 days. He gains20 pounds in the first 2 weeks and his cholesterol spikes and his liver turns to fat-- something none of his 3 doctors predicted. It becomes very obvious that food is an addiction. He's only happy when he's eating McDonald's and then he's borderline euphoric.

There is so much more to be learned from this documentary than just McDonald's will kill you. It really dives into the root causes of obesity in America and who's to blame. Who is to blame? Well, the list is long but it includes fast food companies, No Child Left Behind (Bush is responsible for everything-- that rat bastard!), Congress, schools, parents, TV, cartoons... and of course WE are all to blame because we have no self control over our food addictions.

There is so much more.. you'll be shocked at whatpasses as a "healthy lunch" in school cafeterias and astounded by the number of people in America who eat at McDonald's multiple times a week. And that's just McDonald's. And... do you know what a calorie is?

Go see this movie and then NEVER EAT FAST FOOD AGAIN.

Shrek 2

We saw Shrek 2 this afternoon. It’s actually opening day for this much- hyped movie. I mean, have you been to the grocery store lately? There’s Shrek cereal, roll-ups, ice cream, candy, cookies, crackers, you name it. The marketing is just a tad overboard. But we had a free afternoon before Jason returns to work so we took the opportunity to go to a movie, and considering Jason isn’t up to full steam yet, it’s right up his alley.

Anyway, it was OK. There were a few scenes that made me laugh out loud. They were the scenes where something discreet was stuffed in there for the grown-ups. Antonio Banderas totally steals the show with his character, Puss in Boots. That character is the only one who seemed cute and clever. This time around, Donkey (Eddie Murphy) was just plain annoying. It kind of reminded me of Jar Jar Binks, which is fine in moderation but when he is dragged from scene to scene you get a little annoyed. And, let’s face it, the dialogue wasn’t all that hot. In fact, I noticed some pretty lame dialogue in the first third of the movie. Those Dreamworks writers just aren’t caught up to the Pixar writers. Pixar is like The Muppets, there is consistent humor on adult and child levels. Shrek is back and forth. The scenes I thought were slow, were entertaining for the little kid in the audience and the scenes I thought were funny went straight over the kids head.

I’d still recommend seeing it, however. It was cute and sweet and there are a handful of funny scenes that are worth the price of admission (if you go to a matinee).

Mean Girls

We saw Mean Girls on Thursday night and I have to admit that I really enjoyed it! It was hilarious and clever. It doesn't pander to teen-age girls, it talks to them on their level. And the moral is a good one. The main character tries to get revenge but realizes that's not fulfilling. Most teen-age movies just let the main character get revenge and it ends but this one doesn't do that.

I'd actually recommend seeing this movie. There were several scenes where I laughed out loud. LOUD.

Kill Bill Vol. 2

Quentin Tarantino has a foot fetish. There are a lot of feet in this movie... actually in both versions. And I didn't really notice it that much until Conan O'Brien mentioned it on his show the other night and all of a sudden feet flashed into my head. Lots and lots of feet.

Unlike the feet... this time Quentin does not have a violence fetish. This 2nd version is much less violent and chock full of good ol' Quentin Tarantino dialogue. He writes exactly how people speak. It's sometimes witty.... but not too witty. Like when Lucy Liu says to Uma Thurman, "You didn't think it would be that easy, did you?" Uma says, "Yeah. I kinda did." That was actually Vol. 1 but you get the idea. The conversation between "Bill" and Uma's daughter is written very well. It's EXACTLY how parents talk to their kids. They tell a portion of the story and then say, "B.B. what did you do then?"

I definitely enjoyed this movie. Uma gets her revenge. She kicks Daryl Hannah's ass. There's one scene that had me wanting to run out of the theater into the open air. Let's just say Uma is stuck in a small, dark space and it's very well done. Even in the giant theater I felt smothered and out of breath as she attempted to escape. And Jason didn't do very well with the snake scene... so we each had our own extremely personal freak-out moment in the movie.

The only thing missing? The Pussy Wagon!

Eternal Sunshine

Tonight we caught the late show of Eternal Sunshine for the Spotless Mind. This was a great film! It was poignant and sweet. I had no trouble believing the premise of the story... which is that Jim Carrey's character wants his ex-girlfriend erased out of his memory. It's less of a sci-fi movie and more about relationships and the importance of communicating in relationships. Most of all it's about the memories and experiences that make you who you are. Even though we all have some bad memories... would you really want to erase them? I'd definitely recommend this movie. Jim Carrey is very toned down and Kate Winslet is dynamic. And Elijah Wood is creepy.

Intolerable Cruelty

Jason and I went on a date last night to celebrate the fact that we are on a mini-vacation. We ate at Jake's (chocolate bag of course) then we went to the late showing of Intolerable Cruelty. While the dinner was top notch, the movie was mediocre. I expect more from the Coen brothers. This movie was easy to figure out. It's your run-of-the-mill romantic comedy. George Clooney, who I loved in O Brother, is your typical "no time for love" guy. He's bored with his successful career... he admits he needs a challenge.. and she walks through the door. Catherine Zeta-Jones, though beautiful, doesn't have a whole lot of depth. It wasn't stylized like Fargo or O Brother and the characters definitely weren't as memorable as The Big Lebowsky. And I think it's fair to compare because when going to a Coen brothers movie, I expect something out of the ordinary. Kind of a bummer as far as Coen brothers movies go.